How often does a guy get it SO right, that it feels like it should be wrong?
Hows about this for a list of rights!!
1) Bought New £14.99 Telescope for No.1 Son - RIGHT!!
2) Performed reverse Apache raindance all sunday night - RIGHT!!
3) Waited up freezing cold with crystal clear skies for Saturn - RIGHT!!
4) Took a gamble and woke up No.1 Wife to see Saturn - RIGHT!!
Now, I don’t use expletives where possible. People are always using them to me or about me, and any additional ones would merely complicate matters. But if I DID, then I guess I would be expleting vigorously. The fact is, YES, you CAN see Saturn’s rings with a £14.99 telescope from Toys R Us. I found Saturn simply with the 18x eyepiece, and then zoomed in with the 90x. I near wet meself. Caught up in the madness of the moment, I rushed into the master bedroom, and started to rouse my wife. Now, those of you who know my wife, will also know that we have an unwritten law in our house. Generally, it would be wiser to shave the eyebrows off a grizzly bear using a cheese grater than wake up my missus. The law states that there can only ever be two good reasons for waking the slumbering dragon.
1) You have discovered the house is on fire.
2) You have cooked a sticky toffee pudding.
In the case of the house being set on fire as a direct result of cooking the sticky toffee pudding, then two positives make a negative and the dragon should be left a-slumbering.
Anyway, it was done now. “You HAVE to see this!!” I screamed. “Have you called the fire brigade?” she sleepily replied, the vast array of curlers making her head look like an explosion in a plastic pipe factory.
So down she trundles to the telescope. It all hinged on the next 3 seconds. If she didn’t like what she saw, I’d be eating Paraquat sandwiches all week. But NO!, it was all worth it! No.1 Wife came out with the most remarkable responses, the like of which I hadn’t heard since our wedding night.
“WOW!”, “Im quite impressed”, “That’s really good”, and “Can I have another look?”
!!!!!!! And then to top it all, this … “Can’t you take a picture?”
That’s all the encouragement I need. “But YOU were the one who said “Buy a telescope that takes pictures!”“. At last I can justify spending a little more than £14.99 on some kit now, knowing I have the wife’s blessing.
To sum up, an excellent night, no moon, clear skies, and the firm start to what should be a fascinating hobby. No.1 Wife is already eager to see Saturn again, through a bigger and better scope. The cretin card arrives tommorrow, all being well I wil be calling Steve @ First Light Optics to confirm and pay for my order. I might even call my next child ‘Cassini’. Watch this space…….